Order of the Stick Wiki


Miko arrives to the watchtower, right before some unexpected visitors.

Cast[]

Transcript[]

Panel 1

Miko arrives to a heavily guarded watchtower, riding Windstriker.
Miko: Hail, watchtower
Watchtower Guard: State your business.

Panel 2

Miko talks to an Azurite guard through a small window in the door
Miko: I am Miko Miyazaki, paladin in the service of Lord Shojo. I return from dwarven lands with important news.
Miko: I request shelter for the evening, before I continue my travels home on the morrow.

Panel 3

Watchtower Guard opens the door.
Watchtower Guard: Enter Miyazaki. May our lord's work earn you the blessing of the Twelve Gods.
Miko bows
Miko: To you as well.

Panel 4

Miko: Windstriker, await my summons in the Celestial Realm.
Windstriker glows blue as it returns to the Outer Planes.

Panel 5

Watchtower Guard: I'll be honest, I expected you to be carrying our monthly supplies from Blueriver Fort, seven days to the east.
Watchtower Guard: Our food shipment is four days late, and all we have remaining from the last delivery are tiny packets of soy sauce.

Panel 6

Miko: That is troubling. I cannot assist you in locating your lost supplies, unfortunately.
Miko: I bear a sealed diplomatic pouch with a return message from the High Priest of Thor. I was given specific instructions that the dwarf's reply to Lord Shojo was of critical importance.

Panel 7

Miko: However I should be back at Azure City in another few days. I will inform the military of your ration situation at that time.
Miko: If I encounter any farmers along the road, I will have them bring you some rice.
The Guard bows.
Watchtower Guard: Thank you Paladin. We will be able to hold until then.
Somebody knocks at the door, "KNOCK! KNOCK!"

Panel 8

Watchtower Guard: Two visitors in a day? We usually get that many in a week...
Miko: Perhaps they bear your wayward food supplies.
Watchtower Guard: Perhaps.

Panel 9

Watchtower Guard opens the small window in the door
Watchtower Guard: State your business.
Redcloak (unseen): Sir, have you ever considered the value of owning a really good set of encyclopedias?

Panel 10

Angry, Watchtower Guard slams small window in door.
Watchtower Guard: Ugh, not again! Look, I told you last month, we're not interested.
Watchtower Guard: Damned door-to-door salesmen...

Panel 11

Redcloak, Xykon and MitD are outside the Watchtower's gate, surrounded by dead Azurite guards.
Redcloak is carrying a bunch of encyclopedias.
Xykon: HA! See? I TOLD you we should have said we were selling Girl Scout cookies.
Redcloak: Yes, we would have, if somebody hadn't eaten all of the Thin Mints.
MitD: Sometimes, I eat to fill the loneliness.

D&D Context[]

  • Paladins have the special ability to call a particular mount from the Celestial Realms once per day, for a period equal to twice their level. For Miko that may be long enough that the mount could reside on the Prime Material Plane all day, but sending it back to the Celestial Realms is presumably easier than caring for it when it is not needed.

Trivia[]

  • All Along the Watchtower is a song by Bob Dylan from his 1967 album John Wesley Harding. The song is strongly identified with Jimi Hendrix's version from his 1968 album Electric Ladyland. Released only six months after Dylan's version, the Hendrix version was a Top 20 hit.
  • Obsolete in this day and age, door-to-door encyclopedia salesmen used to be one of the prime marketing techniques for printed encyclopedias.
  • The Girl Scouts have been selling Girl Scout Cookies since 1917. As of 2007 they were selling about 200 million boxes per year.

External Links[]