Breakfast of Champions
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 720
Date published 6 May 2010
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For the other comic titled "Breakfast of Champions", see Breakfast of Champions (401).

Elan manages to persuade Malack he is of no use. The Empress is hungry.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Empress: My breakfast isn't done yet. I don't want to start the talking stuff until after my breakfast.
Empress: Or wait! Let's not do talking stuff today at all, and I can have more food then. Yeah, that's a better idea.
Malack: Maybe we will consider that plan, Empress, but I need you to approve the payment of this bounty first.
Empress: What bounty?
Gannji: The one you posted for this "Nale" and his friends.
Empress: May I eat him? Is he edible?

Panel 2

Haley escapes the rope that bound her.
Haley: Not only is he not edible, Your Corpulence, he's not Nale.
Gannji: Hey, wait. Weren't you tied up a moment ago?
Haley: That was a moment ago.

Panel 3

Haley: Sure, this debonair blond may LOOK like Nale, but that's because he's his identical twin brother, Elan.
Gannji: Yeah, right. That's right up there with, "I turned into a werewolf and ate my homework."

Panel 4

Haley: They were separated when they were infants and only recently became aware of each other's existence.
Elan: It's true, Your Blobbity-Blobness. The only physical difference is my enhanced beardlessness.

Panel 5

Elan: But when it comes to personality, I'm nothing like my brother.
Elan: I'd never betray you if you were trying to conquer a country.
Haley: You tell 'em, honey!

Panel 6

Elan: I would probably oppose you from the start because the whole blood theme really screams "EVIL!"
Haley: Um-
Elan: Plus, I hear there's some sort of slavery, so I'd probably be all up in your business about that.
Haley: OK, honey, Quiet Time.

Panel 7

Empress: Up in my business? UP IN MY BUSINESS??
Empress: No one gets all up in my business, I get all up in THEIR business!

Panel 8

Empress (off-panel): GRRRARR!
Elan: Uh oh, I think maybe she has a bit of a temper...
Haley: No, really? Think how testy I can get, and I'm only the "Empress of Blood" a few days each month.

Panel 9

Empress (off-panel): GRRRRARR!
Malack: Empress, you must calm yourself. Please!
Malack: If this man is who he claims to be, then he can at least help us locate the real Nale.
Elan: Oh, I absolutely could—

Panel 10

Elan: —if Nale hadn't died in a huge exploding castle almost a year ago.
Malack: either ARE Nale, or you're of no use to use whatsoever.
Elan: Well, I guess if you want to put it that—

Panel 11

Malack: Madame Empress, I believe I have an answer to your query about whether or not you may eat him.
Elan: I bet it's "No".

Trivia Edit

  • This strip shares the same title as Comic #401.
  • The exploding castle to which Elan refers is Azure City castle, exploding in #463 where Nale, Sabine and Thog were held prisoners.

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