Contractual Riders on the Storm
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 954
Date published 3 June 2014
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"Durkon" explains how a cleric of Hel could overrule the will of Thor on the subject of storms and lightning.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

On deck unDurkon continues to cast his spell.
"Durkon": ...Control Weather...
"Durkon": ...Control Weather...

Panel 2

Inside Durkon's head
Durkon: Thor's mastery o' storms is absolute! Yer daft if'n ye think Hel's magic can squelch it!
"Durkon": You're forgetting your theology. Surely, you must've learned about this at some point.

Panel 3

"Durkon": Ah, here we are.
Flashback to Durkon in school as a young cleric.
Cleric of Thor: —and one of the most crucial of these many accords between the gods is the Domain Agreement.

Panel 4

Cleric of Thor: The Domain Agreement states that even though each god is absolute master of their specific aspect of reality—
Cleric of Thor: —they will allow followers of other gods limited and well-defined access to manipulate that aspect using clerical magic.

Panel 5

Cleric of Thor: That is why we clerics of Thor can cast Flame Strike, even though fire is part of Loki's portfolio.
"Durkon": More to the point:
"Durkon": Once that contract is broken, my dread mistress is free to retaliate in kind.

Panel 6

"Durkon": If Thor declared this storm beyond the reach of clerical magic, then Hel would do the same for, say, bubonic plague. Or smallpox.
"Durkon": To say nothing of the poisons that would go unneutralized, or the dishonored dead that couldn't be raised.
"Durkon": The toll would be staggering.

Panel 7

"Durkon": And when all was said and done, it would be your precious Thor who'd invoked the wrath of Odin and the rest for breaking the truces—
"Durkon": —while Hel would be swollen with the power of those millions who'd died of curable ailments.

Panel 8

"Durkon": Face it: You're just not that important, Durkon.
Durkon: Ye evil bastard! Thor'll find a way ta punish ye!

Panel 9

"Durkon": I've seen enough of your memories to know how much you value The Rules.
"Durkon": I guess you don't like it so much when they're working against you.

Panel 10

"Durkon": The best part is, if you can barely remember this stuff, there's no way those morons out there will know.
"Durkon": The good little weather cleric will calm the storm, just like he should— and they won't suspect a thing.

Panel 11

On deck
Roy: Are you trying to sink us???
Belkar: He had a spell prepared that will actually solve our problem. That proves he can't possibly be Durkon!!

D&D Context Edit

  • Control Weather is a 7th level spell which changes the weather in the local area.

Trivia Edit

  • The title is a pun on Riders on the Storm by The Doors on their 1971 album L.A. Woman. This is the second strip title to pun on this song. The other is #690, Riders on the Worm.

External Links Edit