|“It's Just Aphasia She's Going Through”|
|Order of the Stick comic|
|Date published||18 November 2005|
|View the comic|
Haley is stricken with aphasia.
- Panel 1
It is now daytime. Elan still stands with Haley who is still staring at the single gold piece.
Durkon: So, uh... we're just aboot ready ta leave, guys. V an' I just prepared our spells.
Elan: Yeah, OK.
- Panel 2
Elan: Durkon, I'm worried about Haley. She hasn't budged in hours, and if nothing else, I would think she'd have had to go potty by now.
Elan: Can you check her out?
- Panel 3
Durkon examines Haley.
Durkon: Well, she not be paralyzed or held or nuthin'. She seems to be in perfect health, except for some fire damage.
- Panel 4
- Panel 5
Haley: Wiup! Rdd is fm, wiup!! F tru'm epdfpjp fm'v rdd wiup!
Elan: Haley, I know you have more Bonus Languages than I do, but now's not the time to show them off.
Haley: F wim prmpu eh r ynrwiu sin mqrm snprzfu' mnbrvcnp!
- Panel 6
Haley: F wim jiafmpy ck! Eh r yfvwcvmfuw rtfy-enprmqfuw ynrwiu! Ruy uix fm'v WIUP!
Durkon: Elan, hold on a moment.
Durkon: Comprehend Languages!
- Panel 7
Durkon: Och, lad, she not be speakin' any language. I cannae understand a word, even wit' tha magic o' Thor. I think she be havin' some kind o' breakdown aboot tha loot.
Haley: Uim MQP diim, AH diim. Afup!
- Panel 8
Elan: I don't understand. Is she gonna be OK?
Durkon: Well, lad, the brain be a funny thing.
Durkon: Sometimes, it just stops workin' right when ye've been through a bad scene.
Haley: Xrfm, xqh yi F vicuy scuuh? Qpddi? Qpddi?
- Panel 9
Belkar: Wait, wait, so she can't speak at all? Even if she wants to?
Belkar: Hey Haley, if you don't want me to tell Elan how you really feel, just say so.
- Panel 10
Haley: Xqrm? Ui! Yiu'm hic yrnp!
Belkar: Well, OK, since you didn't say anything... Elan, Haley is actually in—
- Panel 11
Haley kicks Belkar in the face.
Haley: Vuprz rmmrtz eiim mi mqp srtp!
- Panel 12
Belkar: Objection noted.
Haley: Yrnu vmnrfwqm.
Durkon: It's just like me granpappy always said: A kick be worth a thousand words.
Elan: I'm so confused.
D&D Context Edit
- Characters with good Intelligence scores can speak some extra languages.
- Comprehend Languages is a 1st-level Cleric spell that allows a character to understand all languages, but not speak or write them.
- Sneak Attack is a Rogue ability that allows the Rogue to deal additional damage with physical attacks under some circumstances.
- The translation of Haley's lines is:
- Panel 4: Treasure!
- Panel 5: Gone! All of it, gone!! I can't believe it's all gone! I got eaten by a dragon for that freakin' treasure!
- Panel 6: I got vomited up! By a disgusting acid-breathing dragon! And now it's GONE!
- Panel 7: Not THE loot, MY loot. Mine!
- Panel 8: Wait, why do I sound funny? Hello? Hello?
- Panel 10: What? No! Don't you dare!
- Panel 11: Sneak attack boot to the face!
- Panel 12: Damn straight.
- The cryptogram used is what's known as a substitution cipher, a historically weak encryption that was superseded by the Vigenère cipher and again by modern cryptography.
- There is typo in Haley's cryptogram in Panel 4. "Treasure" should be "Mnprvcnp", and not "Mnbrvcnp". Note that the same typo appears again in Panel 5.
- Haley's disorder is more like dysphasia, which is not aphasia; The former is only a partial impairment of language ability, whereas the latter is a complete loss of language ability. According to the wikipedia article, the two terms are in fact interchangeable.
- The title is a variation of the expression "It's just a phase she's going through", which refers to the rebelliousness engendered by puberty, typically attributed to the increase in hormonal production.
- Roy and Vaarsuvius have previously indicated that they knew of Haley's feelings for Elan, but this is the first time Belkar lets on that he knows too.
- This was during Hollywood's peculiar obsession with "aphasia," including ailments that were not actual aphasia. "Aphasia" showed up in program after program. Like other fads, it disappeared after a few years.