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There are some problems with (newbie) rogues.

Cast[]

Transcript[]

Panel 1

Elan: Hey, look, some kids standing in the path.
Second Level Bandit: Um, surprise! We're, um, bandits, come to rob you of your most valuable possession.
Blonde Bandit Girl: Hand it over.
Halfling Bandit: Uh, what they said.

Panel 2

beat

Panel 3

Haley: Was that supposed to be an ambush?
Elan: That was just lame.
Haley: More sad, really.

Panel 4

Haley dismounts.
Second Level Bandit: Hey, I worked hard on this ambush!
Haley: Listen, you look like a nice enough kid. What are you, 3rd level?
Bandit Boy: 2nd, miss.

Panel 5

Haley: 2nd level, wow, I remember how it is when you're new. Everything is kobolds and copper pieces, and you get excited over a Potion of Barkskin. Good times.

Panel 6

Haley: But let me tell you, we've been through a lot of ambushes, by some very professional monsters, and your—well, it just doesn't measure up.
Second Level Bandit: I was afraid of that...

Panel 7

Haley: So, in the interest of helping out the next generation of thieves, I'm going to offer you a few points.
Second Level Bandit: Oh! Fantastic, miss. Yes, any advice you could give me would be most appreciated.

Panel 8

Haley: OK, well, here's my #1 tip for archers, learned from years of adventuring:
Haley: Never allow yourself to be led into the middle of the enemy's melee warriors.

Panel 9

The bandit notices he's been surrounded by Roy, Durkon, and Belkar. Roy now has a club.

Panel 10

Cut to the other two bandits. Unspecified bludgeoning is happening off-panel, "bonk!
Second Level Bandit (off-panel): Ow!
More bludgeoning, "thunk!"
Second Level Bandit (off-panel): OWW!
Blonde Bandit Girl: You gotta admit, it was a good tip.
Halfling Bandit: Ask her if she has any advice on running away.

D&D Context[]

  • Had the party actually been surprised, the bandits would have gotten a surprise round.
  • Barkskin is a spell which increases a target's armor. A potion of Barkskin costs 300 gold, and is considered a minor magic item, which only appears 15% of the time in a 2nd-level encounter on the standard treasure tables.

Trivia[]

  • This is the first appearance of the Bandit Trio, Second Level Bandit, Blonde Bandit Girl, and Halfling Bandit.

External Links[]

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