Haley and Crystal recall their first meeting while fighting.
Cast[]
Transcript[]
- Panel 1
Crystal: Where are you, Haley? I looked, that barrel doesn't say ANYTHING about how magical the pickles are! I don't even think they're masterwork!
Crystal: But you can look for yourself when I shove that barrel up your uterus!!!
- Panel 2
Crystal hears rustling from behind a bathroom door, "rustle! rustle!"
Crystal: Wait—I hear you! Are you in the crapper? Don't think that'll protect you!
Crystal: I once slit a town councilman's throat while he was taking a dump. Got a free newspaper out of it, too.
- Panel 3
Crystal sees a silhouette behind the shower curtain.
Crystal: Ahhh... I see you, too.
- Panel 4
Crystal draws back the shower curtain and stabs a dummy, "eee!! eee!! eee!! eee!!"
- Panel 5
Haley is hiding behind the door.
Crystal: Damn it! I was hoping to kill her, and here she had to go turn herself into a dummy made of flour sacks!
Crystal: ...
Crystal: Wait a minute—
- Panel 6
Haley hits Crystal in the back of the head with a sap, "WHUNK!!"
- Panel 7
Crystal: A sap? Is that all you've got? HA!
Haley: Yeah, silly me. Why would I think hitting you on the head would have any effect?
- Panel 8
Crystal: This is the best! I've been waiting to kill you since that day. Do you remember that day, Haley?
Haley: Oh, I remember it. I remember it like it was yesterday.
Crystal swings her dagger at Haley and misses, "woosh!"
- Panel 9
Flashback to Ian Starshine introducing young Crystal to young Haley.
Ian Starshine: There you are, honey. I'd like you to say hello to our latest recruit, Crystal.
Young Crystal: Hey.
Young Haley: Hello.
Ian Starshine: She's 19, too, so I'm sure you two will have a lot to talk about.
- Panel 10
Young Crystal: ...
Young Crystal: Nice boots.
Young Haley: Nice haircut.
- Panel 11
Young Crystal and Young Haley glare at each other.
- Panel 12
Cut back to the present time.
Crystal: DIE, WHORE, DIE!!
Haley: I'LL KILL YOU FIRST!
D&D Context[]
- Masterwork Items confer bonuses due to exceptional craftsmanship, rather than magic. Being masterwork is also a prerequisite to being magically enhanced.
- Sneak Attacks with a sap deal nonlethal damage, which has the chance of rendering the subject unconscious.
Trivia[]
- The comic's title is a reference to the 2004 movie Mean Girls, starring Tina Fey, Lindsay Lohan, and Rachel McAdams, a comedy about high school girl rivalry.
- Haley once again uses the sap she took from Isamu in #521, and which he bought in #531.
- The fourth panel, especially the sound effects, recreates the famous shower scene from Alfred Hitchcock's 1960 horror classic, Psycho.
- In the flashback, Haley is wearing the lime green Boots of Speed she mentioned in #3, See Spot Spot and #573, Slumber Party. The boots will eventually be incorporated into her adventuring gear after she dyes them to match her desert armor in #675.
- This is the second flashback appearance of Ian Starshine, the first being in #93 Teenage Wasteland.