Elan accommodates the orcs by providing them a new god.
Cast
- Elan ◀ ▶
- Durkon Thundershield ◀ ▶
- Lien ◀ ▶
- Daigo Da- ◀ ▶
- Banjo the Clown ◀ ▶
- chief grukgruk ◀
- shaman vurkle ◀
- crong ◀
- Giggles
Transcript
- Panel 1
Elan: The shoreline! See, I told you she would lead us to safety.
Lien: Thank the Twelve Gods! I was beginning to think the people who built that tunnel had absolutely no idea where it was going.
Durkon: Water Walk!
Daigo: You had Water Walk prepared?
Durkon: I live onna boat an' wear heavy armor.
Daigo: Good point.
- Panel 2
Elan stops a couple of meters offshore
Elan: Ha ha! We got way with Banjo! Nyah nyah!
vurkle: orcs not have god.
grukgruk: it ok, shaman vurkle. chief grukgruk sure we find something else to worship.
- Panel 3
vurkle: *sigh*
vurkle: shaman vurkle go back to worshipping vague land spirit, shaman vurkle guess. not as satisfying.
Elan: Aww, man. Now I feel bad for him.
grukgruk: there, there.
- Panel 4
Elan and Durkon walk back towards the shore.
Elan: Hey, you know, you could always just become followers of a different god.
Durkon: Aye. Instead o' worshippin' a bull or a clown, ye could put yer faith inna REAL deity, like Thor.
vurkle: really?
- Panel 5
Durkon: Ye'd haf ta atone fer any evil deeds ye did first, but then wit faith an' devotion ye could—
Elan: Or, you could just start worshipping—
Elan reaches behind his back.
- Panel 6
The panel flashes purple as he produces another puppet, similar to Banjo but with a red and yellow color scheme and a big stick.
Elan: GIGGLES the clown, god of slapstick!
- Panel 7
Elan: He's just like Banjo, except instead of playing music, he hits people with a stick.
vurkle: oooo, hitting people more our thing anyway.
grukgruk: OK, orcs worship giggles now.
- Panel 8
Durkon: WHA?!? But tha be just another puppet! Wha aboot Thor?
vurkle: atoning for misdeeds sound like it involve lot of talking.
grukgruk: giggles is god of action!
- Panel 9
vurkle: no like banjo now. stupid banjo and dumb banjo-worshippers get off orc island.
Elan: Don't be mean to Banjo! He can still smite Giggles with his magic banjo!
- Panel 10
The puppets fight.
vurkle: giggles blocks!
Elan: Nuh uh! No force can block Banjo's holy weapon!
vurkle: no force—but enchanted thwacking-stick of banjo's brother giggles!
Elan: Ooooo! That's neat! OK, so they're brothers, but they're rvials[sic] too. Cool!
- Panel 11
Hinjo and Daigo hold back Durkon, who shakes with anger and frustration.
Durkon: But...but thar na real gods! Thar puppets! Cannae ye see tha thar just puppets?!?
Elan: The only way to settle this dispute between two gods is with a pie-eating contest!!
vurkle and grukgruk: hooray!
Durkon: PUPPETS CANNAE EVEN EAT PIE!!!
D&D Context
- Water Walk is a 3rd level cleric spell which allows the subjects to walk on water, similar to the miracle performed by Jesus in the Christian Bible.
Trivia
- With regards to the title, idolatry is the worship of a physical object as a representation of a god, and a pop idol is a celebrity whose exposure in popular culture is a defining characteristic of an era. It was also the name of a talent show on British television from 2001 to 2003.
- The first panel continues the references to the TV series Lost from the previous strip:
- The symbol on the door resembles the DHARMA Initiative logo.
- Lien's comment is a dig at the writing on the series. The series finale had yet to air when this strip was published, but critical reception of it was in agreement with Lien's comment.
- Panel 8 is the second time grukgruk complains about too much talking; he previously complained that the comic is "way too wordy" in panel 8 of #558. Thog is similarly averse to talking.
- This is the final appearance of chief grukgruk. He first appeared in #553.
- This is the final appearance of shaman vurkle. He first appeared in #554.
- This is the final appearance of crong. He first appeared in #551