Porting Out
Order of the Stick comic
Comic no. 366
Date published 30 October 2006
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The Order wraps things up in Cliffport and teleports back to Azure City.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

Vaarsuvius: Elan is on his way presently.
Roy: OK, we're almost ready to go...uh...Wizard Guy
Wizard Guy: Oh shwell... Thank you for honoring me by usin' my given name.

Panel 2

Roy: So Durkon, I have to say, you really outdid yourself against that druid there.
Durkon: Aye, thank ye, but that real praise must go ta me lord, Thor.
Belkar: I dunno, it wasn't Thor down here whacking a giant bear in the face over and over.
Wizard Guy: You know, I didn't NEED to be a wizard. It's not like I enjoy ferrying adventurers all over the place...

Panel 3

Durkon: Thank ye.
Durkon: It's like me granpappy always used to say: Speak softly and beware of big sticks.
Belkar: Of course. I respect you for a nanosecond, and what do I get for my trouble? A dwarf pun.
Belkar: Moron.
Wizard Guy: I coulda been a baker, you know.

Panel 4

Nale: Sorry, sorry, I was...over there doing something you'd rather not know about.
Roy: You are almost certainly correct.
Wizard Guy: They said my cherry turnovers were the best they'd ever tasted.

Panel 5

Roy: Well, I don't know about anyone else, but this was an afternoon well spent in my book.
Belkar: You spent half the time getting smacked around by a girl.
Wizard Guy drinks from his bottle off panel.
Wizard Guy: Bundt, bundt, bundt, bundt...

Panel 6

Roy: True. But we saved a city from a crazy druid, thwarted the villain's plan, rescued the damsel in distress—
Roy: —and still have plenty of time to get back to our mission to stop the forces of Evil from getting their hands on the secret power to bring about the apocalypse.
Nale: I couldn't agree more, Roy!
Wizard Guy tosses his bottle behind him.

Panel 7

Wizard Guy: TELEPORT!

Panel 8

Nale: Wait, what did you just—

Panel 9

The cast disappear with a loud "POP!".

D&D Context Edit

  • Teleport is a 5th level wizard spell. Vaarsuvius cannot cast it because he or she has specialized in Evocation and chosen Conjuration as a barred school.

Trivia Edit

  • This is the strip from whence Wizard Guy gets his name, in the first panel.
  • Wizard Guy told the party he was going to go to the tavern and get drunk in #340.
  • Durkon's line in the third panel is a slightly altered version of U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt's foreign "Big Stick" foreign policy formulation.

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