Therkla pulls Banjo's strings to prevent Elan's sacrifice.

Cast Edit

Transcript Edit

Panel 1

The prisoners are brought to the Orc village where Lien is tied to an alter for sacrifice. Therkla hides in a hut.
Daigo: Lien! Thank the Twelve Gods you're still alive. How are you doing?
Lien: Questioning the life choices that brought me to this point. You?
Daigo: The same, really.
Elan: Wow! Banjo, you have your very own altar! I'm so proud!
Therkla (whispering): *Squeal!* There he is! How does he look so good tied up?

Panel 2

Inside the hut.
Qarr: Perfect! A quick quartet of disembowelings, and we'll be ready to take our leave of this fly-infested dump.
Therkla: Wait—they're going to kill them all?!?
Qarr: Well, duh. That was the point of this mission.
Therkla: No! It wasn't!!

Panel 3

Therkla: We were going to capture Elan and hold on to him until we could assassinate Hinjo. That way he'd stay safe.
Therkla: I mean WE would stay safe. From him.
Qarr: Yeah, well, I figured it would be easier to cut to the chase—
Qarr: —'chase' in this case meaning "spinal cord"—
Qarr: —so I told Grukgruk to sacrifice all four to that stupid puppet.

Panel 4

Therkla runs out of the hut.
Therkla: Ugh! You horrid little piece of devil crap!
Qarr: Geez, what is your problem, mortal?
Qarr: No wonder you people need us to tell you how to be Evil, you'd just screw it up on your own.

Panel 5

Outside at the altar, Therkla sneaks under the curtain.
Elan: Aww, man, Hinjo's gonna be peeved that I got Lien sacrificed to my god.
Elan: He'll probably give that stern paladin look to my eviscerated remains.

Panel 6

Therkla operates Banjo.
Therkla (as Banjo): STOP!
vurkle: *gasp!*
Elan: Yes! I knew it!

Panel 7

Therkla (as Banjo): Yes, it is I, Banjo the Clown, god of puppets! I have seen you orcs worshipping me, and have chosen this moment to make my will known.
Therkla (as Banjo): Do not harm the fair human! He is my prophet, and shall not have one silky luxurious hair put out of place!
Therkla (as Banjo): Defy me, and prepare to feel my googly eyed wrath!

Panel 8

grukgruk unties Elan.
grukgruk: as banjo wish, banjo. chief grukgruk release human.
vurkle: *sigh*
vurkle: shaman vurkle never get to sacrifice anything nice.

Panel 9

Elan: Thank you, o mighty Banjo, for sparing my life. It fills me with joy to hear your words...even though it turns out that your voice is a lot deeper than I imagined it.
vurkle: what about other humans and the dwarf? they prophet too?
Therkla (as Banjo): Huh? Oh, no, I don't really care about them. Kill them, or whatever, I guess. Whatever makes you guys happy.

Panel 10

vurkle: hooray!
vurkle: sacrifice back on agenda!
Lien: Elan! If you're the prophet, SAY something!!
Elan: Truly, Banjo giveth with one hand, and taketh away with the other.
Lien: ELAN!!!
Elan: I think the hand with the banjo is the taketh-ing one. Otherwise he'd pretty much only be able to giveth banjoes.

Trivia Edit

  • In the last panel, Elan paraphrases the Book of Job from the Hebrew Bible, where Job says, "the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away...".

External Links Edit

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.