|“Words Get in the Way”|
|Order of the Stick comic|
|Date published||1 December 2006|
|View the comic|
Nale and Haley go out on a date. The conversation is... one-sided.
- Panel 1
Haley (in her head): Jeez, this dress! I look like a dominatrix.
Haley's Self-Loathing: Actually, you look like a sorceress or something.
Haley (in her head): Hey, no need to get cruel.
- Panel 2
Nale: Ah, you return from the Ladies' Room.
Nale: Your absence was like a confirmed critical from a keen scythe.
- Panel 3
Nale: You look stunning in black, my dearest Haley.
Nale: It's so nice to see you not wearing any of your normal protective gear.
- Panel 4
Nale: I notice you are unusually quiet tonight.
Nale: Do you have no words for a romantic evening such as this?
- Panel 5
Haley: Za ybxy acwwdave yd uv adfv adty dg sdhv?
Haley: Uvrxcav Z rxi'y awvxh? Zg ad, zy qxai'y jvtp gciip.
- Panel 6
Beat panel. Nate has a panicked look on his face.
- Panel 7
Nale (thinking): What the hell? What language was that? Crap, what if she and Elan both took some obscure language like Ignan or Gnoll or something??
- Panel 8
Nale (thinking): OK, don't panic, Nale. When in doubt, laugh and nod. Then come up with some sweet talk to keep from having to respond in the same language.
- Panel 9
Nale: Ha ha ha ha ha! Yes, too true, too true. Heh heh.
- Panel 10
Nale: But, uh, words from any language just get in the way. What can mere sounds tell us that we cannot see by gazing into each other's eyes?
Nale: I say, "Enough words!" Who needs them? Let us have no more words this evening, save for this request:
- Panel 11
Nale: Would you care to dance?
- Panel 12
They walk off as music plays, "♪♪♪"
- Panel 13
The music continues, "♪♪♪"
Nale (thinking): Fantastic. I can't believe I just suggested that we stay silent for the rest of the night.
Haley (thinking): Fantastic! I can't believe he just suggested that we stay silent for the rest of the night!
D&D Context Edit
- Sorcerers in D&D gain their arcane abilities through natural talents, which may mean a bloodline that includes dragons or demons, thus Haley's offense at the remark that she looks like one.
- A Critical Hit may occur when a natural "20" is rolled in an attack. The Keen magical property doubles the weapon's threat range, which for a scythe means a 19 also threatens a critical hit (provided it hits the target's AC; a natural 20 is always a hit). It is confirmed by a second attack roll.
- Medium-sized scythes do 2d4 damage, and feature a 4X critical hit multiplier, the highest possible. A couple other weapon types also have a 4X multiplier, but of all of them, scythes have the highest base damage.
- The translation of Haley's lines are:
- Panel 5: Is that supposed to be some sort of joke?
- Panel 5: Because I can't speak? If so, it wasn't very funny.
- The substitution key is the line itself, starting from both ends of the alphabet to the middle for the key, and working along the line: i.e. Z = I, A = S, Y = T, B = H, etc.
- Words Get in the Way was a hit single for the Miami Sound Machine, led by Gloria Estefan, from their 1986 English language album, Primitive Love. The song reached #5 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.